The day before Kharis started Kindergarten – we got this in the mail:
Her new teacher’s dogs sent a card! How cu-ute!
Her teacher was clearly on top of things (and maybe a Pinterest aficionado).
I (on the other hand) somehow didn’t even realize Kharis might actually need a backpack – or new shoes. I didn’t realize this until the morning of her first day of school.
How could I forget to buy a backpack??
I don’t know!! I was just busy – not like physically busy, but mentally busy – my brain was consumed with contemplating social injustice and other super important stuff – like blog-branding and Bachelor In Paradise (please don’t shame me over “reality” TV!).
I was afraid I was going to have to resort to sending her to school with a Subway Inside Out bag from her recent kid’s meal, but I scoured the house and found a tiny, grimy, purse-sized, cupcake-shaped backpack and an over-sized “Jake and the Neverland Pirates” backpack. She chose the cupcake.
I don’t remember what she ate for breakfast (I think it may have been a left-over Krispy Kreme). It was a little bit of a scramble. But (bless her) Kharis was oblivious.
Thankfully, we had time for pictures:
I think I was supposed to cry when I pulled away from the school after dropping my oldest child off for her first day of Kindergarten. I read all kinds of blogs about it. But there were no tears to wipe away. No ugly cry to hold back.
What happened spontaneously was a giant sigh of relief.
Whew! We weren’t late!
Her underwear were right-side out and frontwards!
When I picked her up and asked about her first day she said,
“It was AWESOME!”
She also told me all kinds of other things that required a follow-up email to her teacher.
- Are kids really allowed to bring stuffed animals? (Not really.)
- Does she really need a blanket for rest time? (There is no rest time.)
Kharis also told me her teacher is pregnant, but I decided it was better not to ask about that (just in case – you know – she isn’t).
Her teacher sent home a good night poem with sparkly confetti to put under her pillow and help her get a good night’s sleep. (Okay – so clearly her teacher is like a full-blown Pinterest-professional.)
Day two she had to take the over-sized backpack because nothing fit in the other one.
When I picked her up that afternoon, Kharis was not wearing the cute plaid skirt she had on in the morning. She was wearing boy khaki shorts over boy tighty-whities (except they were grey…”Grippy greyies?” or “Awful off-whities?”).
She had a tinkle accident. For real, y’all, my sweet little girl said,
“Well you see, you have to ask the teacher and I just waited too long. That’s all.”
Like Elsa from Frozen, she “Let it Go!” Unfortunately it was seconds before her panties were all the way down and she was fully seated on ‘the throne.’
Kharis didn’t seem to think anyone noticed she was wearing different clothes and, of course, her teacher said it was “no big deal.” Mickey’s response was,
“I think all kids that age are like, ‘Hey – might be me tomorrow!’“
I’m thinking probably not. Kharis? She’s fine. Me? I’m a little emotionally scarred from day 2, but I’m recovering.
Several days later I found this in her school folder:
I’m betting 95% of the other kids drew an umbrella. It also would have made more sense for her to draw underwear on a figure, but given recent events – I suppose around the ankles was on her mind.
Anyway…today on the way home from school she told me:
“Dylan and I are thinking about getting married. We kind of love each other.”
One of my favorite teachers of all time said this:
I think I need to get that quote on a wine glass.
PS – New backpack? Check! New shoes? Check! And tomorrow is ‘always fresh with no mistakes in it.’ Thank goodness because we’ve both got a little “Anne” in us. (Maybe we all have a little “Anne” in us.)